Friday, April 19, 2013

Join me---be a dreamer who does!

I have started and deleted this post at least 20 times in the last month.
Why? Many reasons. Abortion access is a polarizing topic for many people. Just the mere mention of the topic abortion creates discord, even though it is estimated that one in three women will have an abortion within her reproductive lifetime.
Also, I am not really comfortable asking friends and family to donate money, but for the Carolina Abortion Fund I am more than willing to get much more comfortable with the many levels of fundraising for a non-profit.
Last year, I began sharing a bucket list dream with a small group of start an abortion fund. Through a few twists and turns, I connected with the Carolina Abortion Fund and am now proud to say I am a part of an amazing group of people who want to be a source of support and part of the solution for NC women in need. For me, it's also way for me to honor the challenges of my mother and the women of her generation who didn't always have safe, much less legal, access to abortion.
While I am not nearly as eloquent as Dylan, he has inspired me to reach out and plea for your support.
(check Dylan out here and you'll see why he's my hero-- 

Anuradha Koirala said "The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all the world needs dreamers who do."
Help this dreamer do more.
Be a hero to a woman in need by donating to the Carolina Abortion Fund.
Any amount will make a difference--$10, $20 or more.
Your tax-deductible donation will make an immediate impact in our ability to provide grants.

Please use the link below for your donating convenience.

What do bowling and abortion funds have in common? The National Abortion Access Bowl-a-Thon! Join us today.

Thank you in advance for your consideration.
With much love and appreciation

Friday, June 29, 2012


Stuck, blocked, whatever you want to call it. I feel like I've been all over the place lately (not in a good way) and I'm trying to sort it all out and get back to level ground. 

I have had too many things in a chaotic state at the same time........which is saying alot for a chick who tends to like a degree of chaos on the regular!  I keep reminding myself that I don't get to pick the cards life deals me, but I can usually choose my reaction.....or at least choose a better one after I calm down a little.
I've been torn about what to share using this forum and have started and deleted more posts than I can count. With that, I have made the decision that it doesn't matter what topic I choose as long as I get off the damn fence and jump in already.......kinda like living in the sticks, you know--BFE (which, by the way, is within a mile of the farm!)
I've been experiencing the joys of creating the new yard layout since mine became a mostly blank area between harvesting pines and last fall's hurricane.  I had the berm rebuilt, which was great since I got to learn what a berm was in the process.  Just in case you were dying to know a berm is an area of land that separates water--in my case, a pond and a canal and it survived two tests courtesy of Mother Nature.  I've also been laying out where future fruit and nut trees will be planted, replanting a tree line, learning to root azaleas and planting bulbs in a few really long flower beds.
Lord help me if I really decide to see if a former city bitch can really turn into a for real though farm chick.  I'm sure this will become the seed for many posts to come just because some things are so amusingly foreign to me since I didn't grow up on the farm....just sayin'.

House projects have also taken up lots of my time and money lately.  My mother loves to tell me that a house is like a child---forever needing something.  I mean to tell you, she hit the nail on the head with that one.  I have the extra bonus of living in the house my grandparents built, which means that the OLMs also feel like they get to weigh in on what I should or should not do.  Mmmm hmmmm, feel my pain on that one!

I'm going to share some of my pet causes, things that give me inspiration and motivate me to change the world one interaction at a time.

Join me as I go on record that I will share my journey better than I have recently.
Oh! Just in case you were wondering......that Boy is very much still a PARB (punk ass rat bastard) and is far, far from the Grown Ass Man he wanted me to think he was.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

The great steamed dumpling event....

Now that I am in my 40's, I have encountered a few things that the older women in my life really should have given me a heads up about.  Of course, that is not how the old lady clan rolls and I know it. That would take some of their fun away and god forbid someone try to disrupt their fun!
It doesn't really bother me that they didn't tell me what they KNOW is coming with each new decade of life so much as the sheer pleasure, some could argue joy and possibly even elation (they sometimes share their friends) as they validate that this really is "normal" ohdearlordwhatinthehellishappeningtome female aging and that I am really not some alien.  I'm just saying, it isn't exactly as the text books described.  Like most things in life, it's all about where in the spectrum you happen to fall with a dash of the genetic deck you're dealt.
Near the top of the list of these new adventures is what I have affectionately dubbed "40's brain".
40's brain strikes without warning and presents with many symptoms--Distant cousins include:  toddler brain, teenage brain, pregnant brain, well--you get the idea.  I had my very own, undeniable, Hallmark should have a freakin' card for this 40's brain moment a few months ago that was almost repeated today.   
Then, I had plans to spend the weekend with the Donnas plus Susan in Hilton Head, SC and was super ready to roll out for a girl's getaway weekend.  You can never have a bad time when you're spending time with the Donnas. It's not just 'cause I could potentially be slightly biased as I love them both dearly. 
I had asked for the day off at least a couple of months in advance, but got the fabulous non-approved, but not quite denied, response of "We'll see how things are when it gets closer."  Unfortunately, as a contractor, I did not have the magic vacation/comp time card or the sick day trump card.  The week of the great runaway, the message became, "Maybe you can take 1/2 day on Friday."  On Friday, the message was "I'll let you go as soon as things settle down a little."  Considering that a 4 pm (Central time mind you, so 5 pm EST) meeting invite had just hit my Outlook inbox before lunch, I knew that time wasn't going to be nearly as soon as I wanted it to be.
At some point there was enough of a break between calls and UAT discussions that I was able to pull leftover steamed dumplings from the fridge and toss 'em in the microwave for "lunch".  Lunch is air quoted as at some point after the normal time for lunch but before the last two calls of my day, I remembered the forgotten and long cooled off dumplings.  I flipped the closed container over and hit the :30 button to make it all better and enjoy a slightly later lunch.  Just something else on my to-do list before wrapping up work and heading south to meet up with the girls, who were already on their way to the reward of cocktails at the bar with a water view at the end of the drive down I-95.
My call ended just before 6 pm EST and I hopped in the car and headed south for a fabulous out of town weekend.  Sunday came way before any of us were ready and we headed back to reality in our northbound caravan of two vehicles.
Fast forward to early Tuesday afternoon, I opened the door to the microwave to nuke lunch. Imagine my shock and surprise at the re-discovery of the neglected steamed dumplings that had been hanging out in the microwave since Friday afternoon. OhMyFreakin'GodJebusOnAStick! Dumplings that have been hanging out in the microwave since not my favorite!  I gingerly pushed down on the bottom of the plastic bowl to ensure that it really was closed and then using as few fingers as possible from each hand slowly turned the bowl right side up where I was greeted by a glimpse of the now batik/shades of grey tie-dyed dumplings safely encapsulated within the fortunately well closed container.  I promptly placed container and dumplings unopened (I have gotten that t-shirt repeatedly during past close encounters with forgotten items found while cleaning out the fridge) into a plastic bag which went into another plastic bag and then to the garbage container outside.  Fortunately for me (and the furry kidlets), no toxic fumes were released during the potential Haz-Mat incident, although the person I was on the phone with took a hot minute to stop laughing at me.  Really, who am I kidding.  It took ME a hot minute to stop laughing at me. 
The lessons:
1. Life is a long, strange trip best enjoyed with the ones you love as much as possible
2. Aging is not for sissies
3. If you can laugh at it, it'll be OK
4. Thank God for plastic Chinese containers that can be tossed in the trash without guilt.
5. Always check the microwave and/or toaster oven before you run away for the weekend.

Thankfully, today the replication of said 40's brain moment was avoided and I thoroughly enjoyed my leftover steamed dumplings for brunch.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Sometimes it's just that simple....

I love it when something is said that provides you with a flash of clarity and you have a (sometimes out loud) and the chorus said "AMEN!" moment.
Not too long ago, I had one of those moments that proved to be the inspiration for my first blog post.  Granted, if I was not such a great procrastinator the post would have happened sooner rather than now....but I digress.
I was talking to That Boy (who is really a Grown Ass MAN and hasn't been a boy for many, many years but that is for another place and time) and the topic of  who should get a "vote" in your life came up.  Being a chick, I had a long list of conditions and situations where I would solicit opinions from different people prior to making a decision. That Boy told me that he had very simple guidelines on who could share their opinions/suggestions/votes for him.  "It all comes down to the 3 F's", he said.  He laughed when I requested he spell it out as I had no knowledge of these 3 F's.  "In order for you to get a vote on anything I do, you either need to be feeding me, fucking me or financing me.  If we don't share DNA and you aren't doing at least one of those things, I don't want your opinion or permission--nor do you get a vote." 
"Furthermore," he continued with a smug grin,  "the bigger the part you play in the 3 F's, the bigger the still may not be the winning vote, or even be a deciding vote; but I will at least ask what you think and take it into consideration."
Just like that my inside voice jumped up, waved its hands skyward and joyfully exclaimed and the chorus said "AMEN!!"  I was thankful that it had not escaped via my out loud voice as often times things slip out of my mouth before the filter has a chance to engage. 
He was speaking man--which is not my favorite language as I am far from fluent and often disagree, but it also made perfect sense.
I tried in vain to hold back the giggles starting to erupt.  Needless to say, the giggle fit won and lasted for several minutes complete with tears streaming down my face and an annoying stitch in my side at the end.
Sometimes it really is that simple. period.
So often, like many of the threads that create the fabric for our quilt of life, things can easily become convoluted and more complicated than they should be. 
I promptly took the "Gospel of the F's" according to That Boy to all of my ya-ya's who howled with laughter all while nodding in full and total agreement.  We have decided to adopt it as our own and use it as often as possible, while sharing with others. Well, mostly.  Maybe with one slight alteration.  I mean, really....not so much an alteration as a slight addition.  At the end of the day, we are not exactly low maintenance chicks and that's how we roll. 

Keeping the F trend intact, the tweak is "Fixin' stuff".  Lord knows that there are few things better than a man who can fix stuff.

Now, go in peace and spread the word of the Gospel....